The post Last Minute Gift Ideas for Father Day appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>Fathers Day is fast approaching and if you have left gift buying until the last minute than don’t worry; Mister Minit has you covered. They have a large range of products to suit every type of dad and their interests.
Instead of getting dad socks and jocks this Fathers Day how about getting him something he would like to unwrap. There are so many options at Mister Minit for dads this year and you don’t have to spend a fortune to get something great. All the products are great quality, well known and trusted brands.
The range consists of everything from key rings, Zippos, LedLenser torches to Victorinox and Leatherman pocket knives with prices as low as $9.95! Surprise dad this Fathers Day by getting him something from Mister Minit and getting it engraved with a special message. He won’t be disappointed!
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]]>The post Make Time to Take Time! appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>Life can get pretty hectic sometimes and we all know that but many of us don’t really acknowledge the fact that sometimes we need to slow down and take a break.
I recently discovered that after months of solid activity, each and every day my calendar full of ‘must’ do tasks ~ you can’t do it all forever. I don’t mean for this to sound like I am naive to the fact the body needs rest but having the knowledge and using it are completely different. I am sure many men and women (I’m sure it’s mostly women though ;p) have this problem. Most of us have some or all of these ‘must do tasks’ and know that we all have lives being lived, houses to be kept, jobs to work, children to look after, school drop offs/pick ups, groceries to buy, dinner to be cooked, the list goes on and on and on. But when do we take the time or even have the time to sit back and rest?
WE DON’T!!
We need to make the time! Clean the house tomorrow – make a cup of coffee and enjoy it sitting in the warm spring sun – take a long hot shower; I’m sure you get the idea. That is what I have learnt over the past week when everything about me seemed to be broken. I decided after admitting to myself I couldn’t keep pushing myself anymore and that the next day I was sleeping in. It was Saturday so I didn’t have to worry about school, the kids would be more than happy to eat breakfast while watching cartoons for a while. They could manage on their own for a couple of hours (thank you TV!)
I was going to take pleasure in the little things.
When I got up I felt recharged, refreshed, happy and ready to take on the worldday (in moderation). Now I know you are all thinking this is common sense and stop telling us shit we already know but sometimes I find it nice to be reminded that we aren’t alone and that yes, life does get hectic, life throws us curve balls and yes life can be very unpredictable and so I thought I may not be alone and others may need to be reminded also. It is OK!
Enjoy life, embrace life and make time for you!
It makes all the difference.
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]]>The post Delaying the Dreaded Tasks appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>I have a habit of putting particular household tasks on the back burner. The main one or I should say the one that I see most often is the folding of clean clothes. Every time it piles up to extreme masses, taking up 5 washing baskets full minimum (no exaggeration) I kick myself and swear I won’t ever let it get that bad again.
And yet each and every time I let it happen over and over again. I get into the swing of it just after I have spent hours folding them all and stick with it for a week or so but then get slack and it all piles back up. Then I get to kick myself all over again.
It is at the point now where I am searching through the baskets to find underwear and the kids’ school socks. How did I let it get this bad? When did it get this bad? I swear only yesterday there was one basket that was barely full – I promise!
It’s just that I hate doing it – I would much prefer to be doing other things! Like cooking, reading or dare I say it cleaning the toilet! That is how much I hate having to fold the clothes.
Is there some secret way to keep motivated that I just don’t know about? Am I the only who can’t stand this chore? Or better yet, anyone want to come and do mine for me?
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]]>The post Wordless Wednesday – Love appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>Todays Wordless Wednesday is brought to you by LOVE!
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]]>The post GUEST POST – The Top 10 Tips for Surviving Co-Parenting appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>A big thank you to Chrissie for her guest post today!!
The Top 10 Tips for Surviving Co-Parenting
Image source: http://counselingatheritage.wordpress.com/2011/09/08/tips-for-succesful-co-parenting/
Co-parenting is a tough gig these days. Some days just getting along with your ex-partner can be just too hard, let alone effectively raising children together. Believe me, I know the feeling! I have put together 10 simple ways to make it just that little bit easier to co-parent with your ex, and some of these ideas could even be put into practice with your hubby if you feel you just aren’t on the same page when it comes to parenting.
1. Have a communication book. We have an exercise book that goes back and forth between the 2 houses. Any information such as illness, medication, recent sleep issues or even just new routines get written in this book, so that the other parent is aware of what is going on. It is really important to fill it out each time.
2. If you find that you can’t have a conversation without arguing, try a different form of communication. Unless it is an emergency, my ex and I communicate through email. This means that there is no expectation that you are to respond immediately.
3. Do not keep each other as friends on Facebook, or any other social media. My ex wanted to continue to stay Facebook friends, but I found that my privacy was being invaded, things I was doing were being used against me, and it created a lot of problems.
4. Create a handbook specifically for your child, if you find the other parent isn’t sure what to do. I saved myself many middle of the night phone calls by creating a simple document telling my ex what to do if Munchkin was teething, if he woke through night, when his asthma is playing up, everything that could happen when Master A was in his care, there was a simple solution that I have tried and know works. I now don’t get any phone calls!
5. Have rules set in place for when either of you start a new relationship. Go with what you are comfortable with. I like my son to have 1 of the 3 days he is with his dad each fortnight to be spent only with his dad, not his girlfriend and her child. You may have a preference as to when your children are introduced to a new partner. Make the rules clear, and abide by them yourself. Don’t have 1 set of rules for your ex, and 1 for yourself.
6. If possible, choose a public place to do swap over time. This means you are more likely to get it done cleanly, and without an argument. If this isn’t possible, do swap overs at the front door. Don’t go into his house, and don’t invite him into yours. This means you are able to fight, and I found it invited my ex to ask too many personal questions about my life.
7. If you get along with your ex, try to arrange a day, perhaps once a month, for them to come out for a play date at the park, or for lunch. Show your children that their parents can still get along, and are still friends. Remember that you are role models to your children.
8. Discuss any concerns you have right away. But be fair. Don’t accuse and don’t use the children as weapons.
9. Keep the adult conversation to the adults. Don’t put down the other parent, or vent in front of the children. Don’t bring them into the situation by telling them to tell Daddy to “make sure he pays the child support this week”. Don’t make your children choose between you and the other parent. They love you both equally, and this is just something you need to accept (and yes I know how hard that is.)
10. If all else fails, and you still aren’t getting along, contact Child Support, and they can provide you with a provider for mediation (or Family Dispute Resolution). They can help you talk with your ex, and try to come to a workable agreement for the both of you. They can also help to create a parenting plan, should you want one (which I strongly recommend).
Above everything I have written here, remember that when it comes to your children, it is not about the parent’s rights to have the child, it is about the child’s rights to have access to both parents, as long as it is in the best interests of the child. Good luck with your journey.
Author Bio – Chrissie is a stay at home single mum to a toddler, with a total handbag addiction. Her blog Me and My Munchkin shares the ups and downs of doing the parenting thing alone.
Make sure you follow her facebook page too – Find it here!
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Girls Day Out With Mr 3!
As you can probably tell by the lack of posts lately that I have been absolutely run off my feet, between studying for exams, assignments, looking after the kids, keeping the house semi-organised from being a complete shambles, organising dinners, the kids’ homework, sorting out our house, our holiday, etc. I have had no time for anything ‘fun’!
I decided as K (3) and I haven’t really had time to do anything alone recently I’d forget about all the shit I ‘need’ to do and just spend time with the little guy. We got a day that D was at school and C was at work where he should beand we took advantage of it. We had the ultimate girls day (yes I realise he is a boy) but we had so much fun.
He got a haircut (he loves getting it cut and spiked up); we bought him a new pair of shoes ($15 Slazenger sneakers from Spendless Shoes or something like that. What a BARGAIN!! And to top it off we went to an actual real café for lunch.
We dined at Cino’s in East Maitland – Greenhills.
The service was fantastic, food was great and the coffee was delicious.
I ordered a big breaky – Don’t be judging me I was freaking starving! – $17.90
K got chicken nuggets and chips – $7.90 which I might add was a waste of money. K was only interested in helping me devour my meal. I did find the prices a bit high but I think that’s the chef coming out in me (I know roughly what everything costs and how much profit they would have made). However the atmosphere was good and best of all it was kid friendly. K and I talked about loads of different things and he got really excited, I just loved the look he had in his eyes.
He was having fun and so was I!
This is something I am going to have to make time to do on a regular basis with the family, whether it is all of us at once or just one on one. It was almost therapeutic to actually sit, relax and just talk (yes I am aware I was talking to a 3 year old but gee has he got some interesting stories to tell) ;p
Do you have regular dates with your husband/wife/partner? Kids?
What do you do to mix things up?
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]]>The post Starting your career later on in life – Tips for getting back into the workforce after kids appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>Today I am excited to say I have got my very first ever guest posting on the blog.
She is talented and full of information!
Starting your career later on in life – Tips for getting back into the workforce after kids
It’s never too late to live your dream!
Many mums out there take extended time off from working life to look after their kids, and indeed the time you spend watching your children grow and learn during the crucial early years is some of the most rewarding time you’ll spend in your whole life.
But if you’re feeling like it’s time for you to get out of your trackies and back into your suit (or smart casual workplace attire), then here are some practical tips on how to make the transition back into the workforce – whether you’re returning to the same industry you worked in before you left, or taking the plunge into a completely new type of work.
Efficiency is key!
Determine whether you are in a position to be able to transition back to work slowly. Look into working part-time or working a couple of days a week at first. If this is not an option, talk to your boss about working from home. Many companies encourage flexible work arrangements, with most organisations often finding such arrangements to be the most effective in terms of employee productivity. This could mean having the flexibility to do the afternoon school pick up and then working again into the night after the kids have hit the sack. Talk to your boss about finding an arrangement that makes the most effective use of your time.
Ask for help
Getting back to the workforce is hard enough as it is. But add kids to the mix, and family obligations and responsibilities can seem like a insurmountable mountain you never get on top of. Try divvying up chores and responsibilities with your partner. This could mean having your partner fix dinners in the evening while you get the children ready in the morning. Frank and clear communication is key in letting them know you need help in managing work with household responsibilities (don’t expect any mind reading here!). Discuss with your partner a concrete plan about how the responsibilities should be divided. If you are a divorced parent, re-entering the workforce can seem like even more of a daunting challenge. Don’t be afraid to ask for child support in order to arrange childcare and babysitting services to help take care of the load and get back on your feet. After all, you are entitled to it!
Know that it will be tough
Many women, upon returning to the workforce, find themselves ridden with guilt at having to leave their children at home. The first couple of weeks (even months) can be an emotional and physical roller coaster. Understand that feelings of sadness and anxiety are perfectly normal and try to find your own ways to make the transition smoother (perhaps video Skype the babysitter during lunch, place photos of your kids on your desk, talk to other mothers at work too see how they coped etc). Ultimately, don’t forget to enjoy the joys and challenges of this new chapter in your working career and remember to reach out for help. Of the millions of working mothers out there, chances are, there is one that has felt just the same way you do at one point or another!
Author Bio: Aliyah Lee is a stay-at-home mum and a financial advisor in her previous life. She enjoys finding creative ways of getting the most out of child support payments.
“This guest post was brought to you by Watts McCray”
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]]>The post Part 2 – The Result of the Lesson appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>The Result of the Lesson
It has been a bit over a week since I went all hard core and stripped Ds’ room down to nothing more than a mattress. How has he gone you ask? Has he learnt anything or was it a complete and utter waste of my time? Well this is how the week went.
The day of destruction and the couple of days following were not received very pleasantly by Mr 5. Not only did he hate his stuff, he now had it in for C and me. Which is fine, I completely understood where he was coming from. In his eyes I was the bitch that took all his stuff (that he hated so much!) and gave it to nicer and more appreciative owners. His little brother K was one of these happy new owners.
After a few days he cooled off and asked if he could have his toys back. The answer was ‘No’. This lesson will not be learnt if I just give his stuff back; it would completely defeat the purpose of what I did. I stuck to my guns. This time however instead of getting angry and kicking the wall or throwing something (makes it easy as he had no toys to throw) he simply asked K if he could play with some of his toys. K obligingly said ‘yes’.
We explained to him how there are people who have nothing and still don’t complain, they make the most of life and appreciate what they have and what people give them. This stuff might not be new, it might not be food they like but it keeps them alive. We showed D clips from the Red Cross and Salvation Army to show him that some people have nothing and how he should be grateful we can afford the things we do.
After seeing that kids not much older than him have to sleep on the streets and eat out of rubbish bins so they don’t starve it was like something inside his head clicked. He saw an advert on one the clips asking for everyone to donate when the door knockers came around and he asked if he could. He got his money box, so did K and they got half of their money out ready to donate. All we needed now was door knockers.
Well, as you have probably read in my post last weekend the door knocker plan didn’t go so well. If you missed it you can read it here. D couldn’t understand why they refused to take his money when there were people who really needed it.
Ds’ attitude has changed dramatically (for now at least!) but it’s a step. He has been helping more with everyday things, helping his brother, tidying up after himself, etc. By day 4 he asked if I could put his bed back in his room. After his help the past couple of days I thought there is no harm in giving his bed back. C put it back together and he made his bed.
Day 5 he asked if he could have his toys back again, I told him that he will need to ask K if he can have any of them back. If K says no then you can’t. Luckily for D, his little brother can be very kind and gave him a few back. It wasn’t all the toys K choose to have but more so a handful of matchbox cars. D was overwhelmed, he hugged K and said ‘Thank you so much K, I love you’.
By this point I’m thinking something has sunk in. Before he would have kicked and screamed and carried on that he wanted such-and-such a toy but not now. He was just happy to have a few cars. This is the lesson I was trying to teach. It does however go even further than this. C sewed a button back onto Ds’ pyjama shirt (yes C is the sewer of the family!) and D couldn’t have been happier or cuter I must add. He went up to his father and said ‘Dad thank you for fixing my button, I really appreciate it!’
D has continued to be helpful around the house and his attitude has maintained its adjusted new found appreciation so we thought it would be fitting for him and K to take the money that they were going to so kindly donate and buy a toy with it. I added the coins I was going to donate so between the two of them they had $39 each to spend.
He almost cried when I told him he could have this money to buy a new toy. That is a step in the right direction if I don’t say so myself.
I had no idea in the beginning how this lesson would turn out. Would it backfire? I wasn’t sure but in my eyes it was worth a go. Now in part 1 of this story I mentioned I may lose a few followers and guess what? I did. I however bid them farewell, my parenting style works for my kids. They know when I say something I follow through. I don’t joke when it comes to them learning life lessons (yes I know they are young but in my opinion a child is never too young to start respecting).
So for now, I would have to say that this lesson has been taken on board and accepted. Lesson learnt! I know that this issue will arise again at some stage in the future and yes I will do the same thing again. For my kids and I, this works. It teaches them.
How do you teach your kids lesson in life? Does it work?
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]]>The post Teaching a Lesson in Appreciation appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>Teaching a Lesson in Appreciation
This is more of a rant for me to blow off steam then it is a heart felt warm and fuzzy feeling post.
I would however love and appreciate any help, ideas, suggestions or heck even some vodka if your buying! (This post was actually written last weekend before the doorknockers came)
I have officially had enough! I thought I was raising my kids to be grateful and respect what they have but the message seems to have been squished and washed away like a bug on the windshield. My 5 year old who I must say is generally well behaved, has decided this last week that being a horrible devil child is more suited.
It only appears to be when he’s at home that his behaviour changes, when he’s at school he is very well behaved and excels. At home he presses my buttons within 30 minutes (easily) of me being awake. All of a sudden he HATES everything! If I ask him to do something, anything regardless what it is he responds with “I Hate ‘that’”.
How has this happened?
How has this happened so fucking quickly?
He has always been disciplined so he has never gotten away with this kind of shit. I am absolutely stumped as to why he has become this little ungrateful so and so all of a sudden. I did however take matters into my own hands today; I have plain and simply had enough! I’m over this attitude and he will learn the hard way. He has left me no choice.
I asked him to clean him room – “I hate my toys” so in the bin they went! (I let K (3) choose some that he wanted and then I took the rest to the Salvo’s so a child who will appreciate them can enjoy them). He has no toys left.
I asked him to make his bed – “I hate my bed” so I unbolted his bed and removed it from his room. He now has a mattress on the floor in his room.
Right now you may be thinking that I am a horrible mother and have taken things too far, I however would have to disagree. He is the kind of child who needs to be shown what it is like to have nothing before he can understand. He will learn to respect and appreciate what we have and how hard everyone has work to own and enjoy the things they do have.
K our 3 year old is respectful (for now at least) so I’m hoping this lesson will be learnt and learnt fast. I cannot go on feeling deflated and at a loss, his attitude towards um…. Well pretty much everything sucks. It just has to stop. I’m putting a stop to it – NOW!
Some of you (if you have made it this far) may stop following my blog because of my blunt honesty and parenting techniques and that is fine. I will not pretend to be the perfect parent with the most perfect kids. I am learning! It is trial and error for me as it is for so many other mums and dads.
Judge me or support me – it’s up to you but thank you in advance for the honest and non-judgemental people who decide to stick around with me.
RANT DONE!
In the next few days part 2 – The Result of the Lesson will be up. So if you stick around you will see if it worked or if I need to try something else.
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]]>The post What Makes A Happy Camper? appeared first on All Mum Said.
]]>What Makes A Happy Camper?
This weekend we are going on an adventure. Well kind of. The man of the house has finally been broken down enough agreed to go camping. After many years of me pestering asking very politely, he has at long last surrendered to peer pressure the idea it will be fun. He did of course agree to this while enjoying a few drinks with friends at a barbeque recently but that still counts as a yes.
Now I don’t want to make him sound uptight or less of a mans man but he isn’t exactly what I would call a camper. He is more of a fancy 4-5 star hotel kind of guy, you know – hot water, soft comfy bed, nice meal, etc. Which is great of course and I appreciate everything about that, who wouldn’t? I however think camping would be a great deal of fun, benefit the kids educationally and not to mention a cheap night away.
The whipper snappers are so excited about it! This will be their first time ever camping, sleeping outside or sitting around a fire eating toasted marshmallows off sticks. The enthusiasm and interest they have is infectious and encouraging to try new things.
Anyway, we went and bought a tent which of course got set up in the backyard as soon as we arrived home from the shop. C wanted to make sure he didn’t look like an amateur trying to set up the tent when we arrived at the camp site. I think he was running on the practise makes perfect theory. It was such a gorgeous sight witnessing all 3 of my men preparing for the wilderness (yes in our backyard!) C has purchased not only our tent but a very fancy self-inflating mattress and pillow for himself. Seriously? Self-inflating, are you kidding me? Like I said, he’s not a camper. The boys and I got sleeping bags which we will most definitely be needing because it is going to be absolutely freezing. I hate the cold but I’m sure a few drinks and a big feed will help with the anti-freeze aspect of the night.
We also got the boys some state of the art glow sticks for safety reasons or that’s the explanation C is giving me for us ‘having’ to buy them. I think secretly he just wants one for himself. Anyhow, Saturday will be our first ever camping trip and is sure to be loads of fun or interesting to say the least. C could very well end up sleeping in the car so the bugs and scary noises don’t get him, he’s a big and tough when it comes to things like that. We are going with a couple of friends so there will be a certain level of excitement and learning for us and the boys that they wouldn’t usually get at home.
Here is to hoping the rain holds out and everything goes to plan.
Do you camp? What makes a fun and successful trip? Is it good company, a great location, the beverages (whatever they may be), the marshmallows or the fresh air and starry sky?
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