With our youngest child at almost two years of age and already three children in our family; the last thing we were expecting and if I’m being totally honest, really wanted was another baby. You may remember me blogging about the screaming of ovaries but the head being so much more reasonable, well basically throw that out the window because it doesn’t really matter at this point.
Unplanned Pregnancy – Now What?
With each of my pregnancies, each time I brushed my teeth in the morning I would get that horrible nauseous feeling that was shortly followed by throwing up (mostly it was just phlegm or vile – too much information – I know) as I had a shower before doing anything else, there wasn’t much else that could come up. Well one morning out of nowhere I got this same feeling but my period wasn’t even due yet! I brushed it off, well I tried to, but it was seriously playing on my mind as it has never happened at any time I have not been pregnant. I did what any women would do in the situation and went and bought a pregnancy test. Well wouldn’t you know it, it was positive. We were expecting another baby. A very unplanned baby.
The next week would dish out more than its fair share of emotions and hypothetical discussions. We were in shock, we were surprised, we were (while I hate to say it) devastated. It was only for a moment but that feeling was worse than anything I had felt before. We have always been believers in everything happening for a reason and this is no exception. While it did take us a couple of weeks to get our heads around the idea, we are now feeling excited and beyond lucky that we can have the opportunity to grow our family. Far too many people would love to have children and are unable to do so. Knowing this, I would feel so ungrateful for not appreciating the gift of being able to carry a child to term. I think that is why I initially felt so bad when I wasn’t thrilled.
An unplanned pregnancy can be a life changing event in a couples life. I know because my first baby was also a HUGE surprise. I was 19 and working around the clock. My now husband was exactly the same and our career choice as chefs unfortunately didn’t pay enough that we would be able to afford to live, especially with a baby. Something had to change. We made a huge lifestyle change and my husband took on a completely new career path. We were extremely fortunate that our risk paid off and his new job paid well enough that I was able to stay home with our baby. Again we saw the unplanned pregnancy as ‘everything happens for a reason’. In that case it made us mature and work out what we wanted from life instead of just drifting through it.
So back to the original story. We are now expecting baby #4 and our other three children are over the moon excited. Bub is expected to be in our arms in early November.
Have you had an unplanned pregnancy? How did it change your life?
Good luck with it all!
Thanks Fiona. xx
I’ve never had an unplanned pregnancy because I’m one of the ones who takes years to get pregnant {so we found out}. Hopefully it wont take as long next time round. Congratulations to you and hubby Kell.
Thank you so much Toni. Even though it has shocked us we know we are unbelievably lucky and so grateful for the gift of being able to have children. I’m sure your little miss will get a sibling to play and fight with, when you and hubs are ready of course! xx
I fell pregnant 3 months in to a relationship. 4.5 years later I am happily married to the father of my 4 year old daughter Definitely not planned but definitely meant to be. Congratulations, exciting times ahead for you all xx
It was definitely meant to be! I love hearing stories like yours Jane. Thanks for taking the time to comment. xx
I too had an unplanned pregnancy My daughters were 17 and 14 at the time so this was a real surprise. Our son will be 21 this week and we are all still smiling. Congratulations on your new baby he/she will be a blessing to your family as our ‘oops’ was
Thank you Karen for sharing your experience! I can definitely see ‘oops’ being a blessing to our family. My children are so excited to be having another brother/sister joining the family.
Congratulations! I’m one of the many who suffered years of infertility followed by 6 miscarriages, so I just can’t imagine it happening by accident for us (we are now lucky enough to have 2 children but sadly, no more). I’m glad you’ve come to be happy about it and all the best!
Hearing stories like yours and those who cannot have children is what makes us so grateful we can. It may have taken us a little while to get used to the idea but we are so extremely lucky. Thank you for sharing your experience and leaving a comment Sonya. xx
I think the shock is more just the idea of change – even if you are trying, you have that moment of shock and what was I thinking etc…but we all know you get on board when the time comes!! Congrats!
haha yes I think you could be onto something there Lydia!
Wow and congrats!! Little miracles but they do take time to get your head around it at first!!
Absolutely Caroline. We were very surprised and shocked but definitely excited and grateful now.
Congratulations! I’ve never had an unplanned pregnancy but I did have the surprise of expecting twins!
That would definitely have been a surprise Ingrid! Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment.
Congratulations!! I think those of us with more than one child can understand your shock and hesitation when you first found out. If it is unplanned it is only natural that your mind needs a little time to catch up with your body! I am a firm believer in everything happening for a reason too and this little bub will is sure to be a treasure for your family! Roll on November! 😉
I’m so pleased many women can relate to the mixed feelings and jumbled emotions. e definitely needed time for our minds to catch up with what was happening. Very excited now!! Thanks for stopping by Min. xx
Congratulations! You can never have too many children!!
I am blessed with a ridiculous amount of fertility and have to be very cautious about this – especially now that we have 6 kids! You will love being a Mum to 4 – a fab number of kids by the way! Enjoy the journey. Xx
I love kids. I just never imagined having this many of my own. haha. I have come around to the idea now and am quite excited. Thanks so much Jody for stopping by.
Congratulations! It will certainly be a change for your family but a beautiful one. All the more love to go around.
So much love Anne! The other kids are unbelievably excited. Thank you for taking the time to stop by and leave some comment love. xx
Congratulations. What an exciting time for your not so little anymore family. None of my three were planned as such but very much wanted.
Yes the family is definitely not what I would call little anymore but I grew up in a big family and it was a lot of fun. Just never planned on having more than a couple of kids myself. Lol. Yes the kids are much wanted. xx
Oh congratulations !! I love baby news!!
I can totally relate to your wonderful dilemma…..Hubby and I once said we should start a family….before we knew it we had 5 children…..each loved and wanted but not planned per se.
I thought we were well and truly done when oops…number 5 came along….and it was when I was 38 and with my biggest age gap ever between the girls.
I believe everything happens for a reason and we can’t imagine life without her!
We too believe everything happens for a reason. I thought we were done after #2! Meet whoops and oops. haha.
The second they are born it is like they were supposed to be with you, like they always have been. It’s weird isn’t it?
Congratulations.
An unexpected pregnancy can be such an emotional shock. Once it sinks in, it becomes a blessing in disguise and so exciting. I am sure this one will fit right in!
That is our thoughts exactly. It was a massive shock (I think it was more so the number of children it meant we were going to have) but now that it has sunk in we are quite at ease with it. Thanks for commenting Alicia.
i am so excited for you. Just because it wasn’t planned doesn’t mean it won’t be so loved!!
There is no doubt it will be very much loved Alicia. It was just a huge shock!
Congrats… I have 4 kids and the fourth you don’t even know they are there…. Oh and my fourth is the most relaxed, easy going kid just because he get nothing.. lol Sadly they were all planned.
haha our third is like that! She just fit in and does whatever. No fuss. Fingers crossed #4 is just as easy! Thanks for stopping Natalie. xx
Wow, what a shock! A close friend of mine had an accidental pregnancy after her hubby had ‘the snip’ – she couldn’t enjoy the pregnancy at all because she just felt like she didn’t want it to be happening. But when the bub finally arrived she fell instantly in love with that little bundle. Good luck with everything!
#TeamMM
Oh wow! That would definitely be a shock. I couldn’t imagine feeling any other way than full of love when I hold my baby. Thanks for stopping by. xx
Yay!!!! Although you probably didn’t think that when you got the result. I can’t say that I’ve had an unplanned pregnancy yet. I always wonder how I’d go with a second yet I see people like yourself with 3 kids…it makes me nervous!!!
I definitely didn’t feel that way to begin with but a few weeks done the track I am excited. Thanks so much for taking the time to comment Eva.
Congratulations! I’m glad you’ve come to terms with it, but it would have been perfectly OK if you hadn’t.
I had an unplanned pregnancy at 23 when I was single and had no money and no interest in babies. I chose termination and I’m grateful that that choice was available to me, even though it was something I was very sad about for a long time.
Enjoy!
Thank you for being so open about your experience Dorothy. We had tossed up that idea but we were distraught for just considering it (there was no reason beside shock for us) so we knew it wasn’t for us at this time. I have to give credit and have no judgement to women and couples who can and do do it as I completely believe it is a hard decision to make. Thank you Dorothy. xx
Congratulations! No unplanned pregnancies for us. I wanted mine 2 years apart and they are 2 years and two weeks apart. 😉 That’s planning for you!
That sure is planning Kylie! My first two kids are 2 years and 1 month apart. I thought 2 years would be a good age gap as well.
Thank you for being so honest and for sharing your lovely news with us. I haven’t had an unplanned pregnancy but still, each time was a big surprise full of extreme emotions. Thanks for linking up x
It is a very emotional experience whether you are planning it or not. Thanks for having me. xx
Huge congratulations to you and your family! Our first son was planned. Our second son was not exactly planned but we knew we were playing with fire. Our third son was entirely unplanned. He’s now 9 months old. If I get my way there will be a fourth child, we’ll see.
Thank you so much Claire. Once you get over the initial shock it is good. You get excited. We have also had a ‘playing with fire’ baby but that we took that one in our stride as we knew the chances were pretty good of it happening. Good luck with getting hubs on board with baby #4!